Overly Positive

Mike Fahey from Kotaku reports on the triple-digit exhibitors coming to this year’s Penny Arcade Expo, the fan-based show that took in all of the waylaid common gamer folk left out in the cold from E3. PAX has always been a show for the fans, and this year is no different.

Now, there’s a possibility I might be at this show this year, and while I’ve never been to a PAX before, one thing I do know is fandom. Years of working at conventions and even being crazy enough to chair them means that I’m somewhat well-versed in the ways of geek culture and how they pan out at events such as this one. But some of you might not know about the best of the best when it comes to geek fandom, so for those of you planning on attending, here’s a primer of incredible things you’re going to experience at PAX, or at any other show for geeks for that matter.

First things first – don’t think that you’re going to be a unique snowflake on a winter day. Just because your gamertag or userid is Sephiroth3 and you are totally cooler than all the other Sephiroth‘s because you got the single digits, doesn’t mean it’s going to cut it with your fellow geeks. Think about it – you are here with (literally) the unwashed masses, and unless you made a name for yourself getting caught having cybersex with a female who turned out to be a male who turned out to have a female voice, you’re not going to be known. Tens of thousands of fans come to PAX every year, so being unique is a bit difficult. On the bright side, if you don’t want someone to know about your escapades as Arktooth the Sex Hunter Orc, it’s real easy to blend in with anyone else.

You’re probably going to encounter at least one person who you might consider a “fanboy”. Now, unlike a forum, you can’t hit ignore on a fanboy, nor can you go to another part of the boards, or worse of all, take out your favorite blowtorch and flame them to death. The first two are difficult to do, and the third, while probably immensely satisfying in the short term, would probably land you in jail in Seattle. Fanboys typically lack social cues – meaning they don’t know that rolling your eyes or turning your back on them means you don’t give a crap about what they’re saying – and they most certainly will always stick to their guns even if you try arguing with them. There is, however, a good side to fanboys. First, they’ll always make you feel better for that secret fanboy-ish type fetish with Princess Toadstool that you’ve been hiding. And second, you can always counter one fanboy with another. Find another fanboy who agrees, or even better yet, disagrees with the one harassing you and turn them towards each other. Like Furbies, they’ll just keep yammering away while you make your escape.

Lastly, you might think that you’re all that and a bag of Salsa Cheetos against the AI or even online against scrubs, but don’t worry – PAX will be a humbling experience for any competitive game you choose to play.  You’ll be up against human players who can not only trash talk you over the mic but who you can see give you the middle finger as they teabag you into submission in Halo. You won’t have to hear that some 9 year old who uses the XBox as a babysitter trounced you in Street Fighter IV, you’ll see it happen, sometimes in front of a live audience of your geek peers. Relax though – all of this is either A)A learning experience that tells you that you need some humility on the geek ladder or B)A way to make yourself feel better that you can always fall onto the tired, yet classic excuse of “having a life” (despite going to conventions) as opposed to your 50 hour a week, never-gotten-laid-ever opponents. So either way, you win!

Yep, PAX – something every geek should definitely look forward to – maybe I’ll see you there. Just don’t hate me for having a grin on my face the entire time, ok?

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