So out of Kotaku comes a news story about a family whose XBox was responsible for burning down their home. Apparently, the XBox was left on for a period of four days, with a notebook on top of it blocking the vents. The XBox overheated and thus caused a fire that cost the family their home. Upon finding this out, they did what any American would do given the gravity of the situation and what values they’ve been taught – they looked into suing, but actually gave up due to financial reasons.
Ok, so perhaps trying to sue Microsoft would be kind of like trying to push a brick wall over with a toothpick, but at least the conclusion that the XBox was responsible still seems sound. I mean, yeah, the family lost their home, hopefully has insurance to cover “XBox left on in order to play old school Halo” circumstances, and probably will never let their family ever have a video game system again, but they can look into the bright side – they set a precedent even without burning some cash on a lawyer.
Think about it. If a reputable source like a fire department can reliably say that the XBox burned the place down, why not use it for other things as well? It’s not like video games have enough to be blamed about anyway, from bad parenting (game systems don’t ground kids very well) to violent behavior to now, what appears to be the first in fire, floor, and famine. What’s one more thing on the hill of irresponsibility and passing the buck that we’ve come to know and love anyway, right?
I can see the excuses now. Late to work? The XBox red-ringed and deleted all your achievements, forcing you to get them all back in a 96 hour marathon session. What about food going bad? Yeah, that XBox game was so good you couldn’t put it down to put away the groceries when you got home. And your inability to do your homework? Well, the XBox ate it, of course. Clearly Microsoft has not tapped this unmined potential yet, because no program that automatically generates an excuse having to do with the XBox has been developed and packaged for prices that make a cheapskate downloader have a heart attack.
Seems that taking responsibility is a moot point, because inanimate objects can neither protest nor file a complaint about your delegation. It’s the perfect marriage of non-accountability and simplicity. It takes you less time to say the XBox did it than to come up with some long-arse conclusion not about how you had an “emergency” and just “had” to stay for hours. Ah – there’s Microsoft for you – coming up with things that 95% of the population will be able to benefit from but which they fail to understand.
I love progress.
Subscribe for Optimism!