It’s the End of the Gaming World as we Know it

In another way of feeling like I have some kind of masochistic sense of duty to the Internet, I’m a forum moderator by some trade. I’ve done moderation for forums for a number of years, ranigng from anime sites to event sites, to gaming. Perhaps part of the reason why I’m just so damn sunny is because I had the rage melted out of me years ago by too many interesting contributions from the community, such as posts that start and end with “this sucks, I want to kill myself”. When you see enough of that, you cope.

One of the best parts of the job is dealing with an “End of the World” thread. You surely have seen the type. They’re most common on gaming forums and are basically a reaction to an announcement or bit of news. The way these people were posting, you’d think someone came to their house, stole their crap, peed in their cereal, and made them eat it.

I’ve got one shining example that dares to reach 100 pages:

http://www.warhammeralliance.com/forums/showthread.php?t=43941

As a moderator, I’m obligated to crush their hopes and dreams under my rule-enforcing boot, but why do that when I can simply show them the silver lining in the cloud? That silver lining, my friends, is the banhammer.

I’m doing people a great favor by banning them for comments that they wouldn’t dare say to anyone’s face. Banhammers allow me to tell people that there’s a whole new wide world out there beyond the forum whoring you do. Bans, in their own sweet affectionate way, tell people they love them, because they care about people enough to make them IRL successful. Bans also expand people’s horizons. I mean, why wouldn’t someone find another community they can contribute to with their productive discussion titled “how I will kill the game developer on a budget”?

Bans help other people realize is not socially acceptable in other places. Sure, they may stumble through with all the bedside manner of a bar bouncer online, but a good, solid ban will take them to places they would never have dreamed of doing while making boring contribusions, like to the bathroom, the kitchen, and the other computer sitting on their desk with all their porn on it. Far be it from me to deny you your fantasy of sleeping with both Scarlett Johannsen and Christina Aguilera at the same time, so bans help that along as well.

So help us, help them, and report those bans. You’ll be saving lives.